I can still have a man in my life: Rekha

            Rekha On Life, Aging Death, Babies, Make-up & Makeovers...

Q.1 Your fans still feel very distant from you?

I beg to defer. My fans are no different from me. They celebrate the fact that I'm part of their life through my movies, my photo features and my interviews. At the risk of sounding vain let me say, they absolutely love the fact that I've happened to their lives. And I'm not there as just an invisible entity.I'm very much a part of their family. They find solace in me, as I find love in them. My fans and I validate each other's existence. Unconditional love is possible only with those whom you don't meet.
That's the nature of my relationship with God, and with my fans. There're millions of questions hovering in my mind. Most of them aren't worthy of bothering me. When people are troubled they indulge in all kinds of vices, like drinking or having an illicit affair.I just turn to my fans who share an unconditional love with me. Even someone who has just seen a photograph of me has nice thoughts about me. I've never got negative vibes from anyone. If this isn't a blessing, what it?

Q.2 Do you miss children?

Not any more. I do not miss children. Even if I find the ultimate man to have babies with it'd be very unfair to my priorities. I can't be there for just one humanbeing in the world. Because if I have a baby I won't be able to focus on anything else.
Then what happens to the babies all over the world with whom I'm connected? If you have the power to be Rekha then you better be prepared to reach out to anyone who wants to reach out to you.

Q.3 What about a man?

If I had a man I'd just be devoting all my attention to that one person. I'm an extremely uni-focus person. Main unka bed bhi banaoongi. I'll take out his clothes, personally monitor his menu, prepare the dabba and personally deliver it to him. I don't think I am capable of enjoying the best of both worlds.
I can't deprive the other world of fans and admirers just for that narrow world of a family. Maybe I'm being unreal and impractical. But I'm not in denial. If I find someone who's willing to share me with my fans I might change my mind

Q.4 So many of the actresses today idolize your looks, makeup and clothes.

I hope all of them do The beauty of it is, I don't have to spend hours planning and executing my clothes, makeup, etc. I've done it for forty-odd years. It's like cooking and swimming. Dressing up is second nature to me. I can't bring myself to spend more than fifteen minutes on makeup and clothes.

Q.5 What do you know now that you didn't know ten years ago?

I now myself as a woman. Even when I was a girl I knew what the woman in me wanted. Now I feel the most amazing thing about my life is the potential of the unknown. Every moment lived is yesterday's headline. Every unlived moment is adding to your growth as a human being. My responses yesterday are invalid today. I feel more sorrow today than I did yesterday. That doesn't mean I'm in pain all the time. You must understand I'm growing older. But there's so much more awareness to make a difference to myself and others. For example, I don't know there's a man for me out there or not. That's the potential of the unknown.

Q.6 So you think there might be someone out there?

Don't mistake the potential of the unknown for expectations. I'm a very action-oriented person. I don't sit and speculate. I can't sit still anywhere. I don't just listen to people. I think and act on what they say. Every channel for self-improvementan image on television, a lovers' tiff at the traffic signalhas a profound impact on me.

Q.7 You share your star sign with so many Bollywood luminaries including Mr Bachchan.

Really? I didn't know that.I don't believe in astrology Don't believe in wearing big rocks on my fingers to change my destiny. I feel self-respect and faith in yourself and the Creator combined with intense hard work, shapes your destiny. It's not time that shapes your faith.

It's what you do in that time. It's the choices that you make in life that determines your future. Time is God and I'm part of God. So I need to get up and use that time to the best of my abilities.

Q.8 Who are the younger actors you're fond of?

I'm fond of all of them, and I'm not being diplomatic. When people try to compare my Umrao Jaan with Ash's I get fiercely protective of her. She looks unbelievable in Umrao Jaan. I don't know how it will do commercially.
But I'm hoping and praying that this film does for Aishwarya Rai what Umrao Jaan did for Rekha, and more. My heart goes out to Ash. She's been around for so long and yet not been there. That's how it was with meuntil I did Umrao. It seemed improbable that a Tamilan girl talking Urdu would work Similarly this South Indian girl should realize her potential in Umrao. She doesn't need to go to Hollywood to prove herself. She's our own. Why Bride & Prejudice? Who are these people from outside trying to tap Ash's potential? She's our treasure. It's time we acknowledge her.

Q.9 Do you like the trend of re-makes?

Why not? It's an intriguing phase. But if someone comes to me and says he wants to re-make Pakeezaah with me I'd say, 'Hello????"

Q.10 Why hello?

Because Meena Kumari was 21 when she started Pakeezaah. I'm 51.

Q.11 Are you really 51?

Yeah. Why? You don't believe it? Are you in denial? I'd like to believe I'm 28. Seriously age is not about years. It's about what you've done with that time. Dene wale ne shayad thoda zyada hi de diya mujhe.

Q.12 What does one expect from you in the coming year?

I don't know. I'm just so grateful that people respond positively to anything I do off or on screen. My sister always says, "We're not human beings having a spiritual experience. We're spiritual beings having a human experience."
I just hope I learn from every moment I live. We try to numb the pain of existence. But that's just escapism. Feel the pain. Don't blank it out.

Q.13 Do you shop?

Until ten years ago I was a mad shop-a-holic. But now the only thing I invest in is plant. Recently I've started indulging by working out.

Q.14 You go to a gym?

No I've a little gym in my home. Look at me; I'm giving away personal details. This is just not me

By Subhash K Jha